In Their Eyes II

I want to build on the last post.

When we look into our dog’s eyes, we are looking at them through our filters, our beliefs and our emotions.  It puts a spin on what we see.  No judgment, it simply is how we see the world. 

My writing the last post was to bring the animals side or point of view to the table.  By having both human and animal point of view on the table it allows for a fuller picture for all of you to look at.  We see our side easily, it is the animal side that is harder to see and understand. 

All the animals are asking is for us to take a look at their point of view.  In seeing both  points of view it opens the door to see a meeting place in the middle.  There is no right or wrong, it is simply point of view. 

The outcome between the human and dog in the last post was; the human listened to her dog and decided not to put the dog down, at that time.  She was relieved not to have to make that decision and to know her dog was ok.  It was just a misunderstanding. 

My writing was to give all of you an opportunity to stop and ask yourself what am I seeing here?  If we can stop and step back it allows us a resting place to see the bigger picture where there is more information.  With more information we can make wiser decisions. 

In Their Eyes

What are people really seeing in their dogs eyes as the dog is nearing the end of its life?  I hear so often from people that their dogs eyes are sad, or their dog’s eyes are telling them it is time to be put down. 

In a case I recently worked on the the human was convinced the look in her dog’s eyes said; it did not like its life anymore and he wanted to be put down.

What the dog showed me immediately was he was picking up from his human that the human was not pleased with him and was going to kill him.  They have no fancy words like euthanasia or be put down. 

What the dog eyes were really saying was, what have I done and why do you want to kill me?  He was doing his best to do his job so he could stay in the pack. 

He made it clear he was far from ready to go.  Actually what he wanted was to be allowed to go in his own rhythm or to die on his own with no help. What his human saw in his eyes and what the dog was saying with his eyes were two different things. 

I am writing this as I see so much misunderstanding.   It is not as cut and dry as we think it is.  Maybe, if we stop for a moment and put our way of looking aside and look at it from the animals side, we will see something different. 

What is really in their eyes? 

Is It Grief?

I recently worked with a dog whose pack leader had died the month before.  The dog’s human was concerned the dog was grieving the loss of its pack mate, as there had been changes in the dog’s behavior and health.  This person was worried she was going to loose this dog too due to grief.

Immediately, as I worked with this dog he showed me how hard it was without the leader dog and it was now up to him to lead.  He was stressed and the stress was causing problems physically.  This dog was a middle of the pack dog, not a lead dog.

Going back to hard wiring, pack law, which says someone has to lead the pack at all times.  It is not a thought process. This dog was simply feeling the hard wiring and was responding to that hard wiring.  The job was beyond this dog’s capability and that is what the human was seeing.  It was a lack of this dog’s ability to lead, not grief. 

I explained to the human she had to step up and be a stronger leader.  I showed the dog he did not have to lead and the human would lead.  He relaxed and the human understood what she had to do. 

I am learning it is important to remember they are animals with instincts that are hard wired into them and they function on that wiring at their level, not ours.  When those lines are kept clear there is less pressure, a better seeing and understanding of what is going on.

When we can step outside ourselves it is amazing what there is to see. 

What’s Right?

When an animal is old, has health issues and is nearing the end of their life, the question often comes up.  What’s right?

It is a huge question with no straight answer. 

I worked this morning with Samantha who wanted to prepare her dog Glow and cat Diva for the addition of another dog.

The new dog, Lily, is old, has health issues and is nearing the end of her life.  Lily’s human is a breeder, with many other dogs and is not in a position to give the kind of care she needs.  The most obvious solution, put her down.  Was this right?

No, Lily’s human and Samantha realized this was not right for Lily. What to do?  After a great deal of thought, Samantha came up with the idea that Lily could come live with her, she was willing to give Lily the care she needed and allow Lily the opportunity to live out the rest of her life without the need to be put down. 

Lily’s human saw Samantha’s offer of taking Lily as a wonderful solution. Can you imagine letting a dog that you raised from birth, showed successfully, has lived her whole life with you, that you love, and let go at this stage?  Putting feelings aside and deciding to do what is right for Lily, that is love.

Glow and Diva are ok with Lily coming into their territory.  Lily is ok with leaving her pack and coming into a new pack.  She was very clear she was not ready to leave that body and her human was picking that up which allowed for taking Samantha up on her offer. 

What’s right?  When we are willing to step away from our emotions and point of view it allows us to see a bigger picture in which there are solutions. 

I want to honor both of these people.  One for letting go and the other for taking a dog knowing that dog will not be with her for very long.  Something to think about.  

Makeover

I have turned the Bio into About Sandy.  For people coming to the site for the first time, About Sandy, will give them a better idea of who is Sandy?  I took out the dry date stuff and created a story of how I came to what I do now.

I kept the title Work & Contact Me and totally redid the content.  I expanded the description of what I do and did the same for what I do not do.  Also expanded the what I do in my two specialties.

I think by reading both, About Sandy and Work & Contact Me, people will now come away with a clearer idea about me and what I do.

I decided to leave the banner as is and also the two phrases above the banner.  At first I thought I would totally dedicate the blog to end of life.  Then as I went through the process of rewriting the Bio and Work & Contact Me, I realized to have the blog be only end of life I would be making the focus too narrow.  I like the idea of leaving the door open for writing about other things too.  All is connected in the bigger picture of life.

Doing this makeover was a wonderful opportunity for me to reevaluate myself and update myself.  A good thing as it brings fresh energy to the whole blog.